July 15, 2021 –
I think I’m finally about to understand expectations, and I want to share with you some thoughts.
Studies show that “people who harbor unrealistic expectations are especially prone to anxiety, depression, and unhappiness.”
Blind spots are things about ourselves we are unaware of. Discovering our blind spot helps us find out our areas of improvement. Discover your blind spots by identifying all the things/events/people that trigger you in a day — trigger, meaning-making me feel annoyed/weird/affected. These represent my blind spots.
Every person has flaws. What’s most important is to understand them, acknowledge them, and address them. Each one of us, being human, has some amount of false expectations.
Don’t expect everyone to read your mind. Many people have a default. Never expect others to know how you feel if you haven’t told them. People can‘t read minds, even if you think they should know you well enough to decipher your behavior. People’s emotional landscapes are entirely different from your own, so don’t hold them accountable for your false expectations.
Perfection is not attainable. Stop pretending you have to be perfect and cut yourself some slack. Let go of unrealistic expectations. No one can fulfill everyone’s expectations, no matter how hard they try to do it. One can’t please everybody, so try to accept that and move on!
Be kind to yourself. Once you are more aware, you set high expectations, avoid repeating past mistakes, and making a positive difference with yourself and others.
Setting high standards can serve as a useful motivational tool. Expecting yourself to be perfect takes the joy out of life. But having rational expectations can motivate you to achieve your goals. Transform high expectations into achievable ones, and experience less anxiety, depression, and unhappiness.